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Dec. 7th, 2009

  • 11:29 PM
I can't come to terms with it.
It was all a lie.
It was never real.
I got fucked over ( once again )
Why did I ever think there could be one that was different.
Trust no one. Not even yourself.
Cos when you do, this is what happens.
FML.

Fingers crossed.

  • Dec. 7th, 2009 at 5:41 PM
After so many texts, so much tears and thinking through things, endless sleepless nights and heartaches, I can't sit down and get a proper post out for now at least.

I just hope that my decisions was right and things will not end up the way how things would right now.

Come what may, like seriously.

Alright, have to go for some class loving at ECP.
Tillagain.
Today was a crazy day
it was so much fun watch 3 of my best friends doing extreme makeover to their hair

first off, rachel dyed and highlighted her hair and it turned out nice! love the highlights!

then it was syl who was freaking extreme! she cut bob hairstyle and dyed her hair. her hair colour is nice but i am still not use to her short hair. BUT she look so much younger now!

and then nyssha who spend like damn alot on her hair because she extended her hair. it looks really good cause it doesnt look fake at all. it is as if the extension is her hair.

i had fun waiting for them and i finally bought my shoes! my black pumps is like gonna spoil soon and i finally got a new pair for myself! love the new shoe.
fortunately my mom is willing to pay for this.

tmr job interview and then girls day out with edna and nyssha. PLS LET ME GET THE JOB! I NEED CASH!

(everybody's got to learn sometime)

  • Dec. 6th, 2009 at 4:13 PM
Clem: This is it, Joel. It's gonna be gone soon.
Joel: I know.
Clem: What do we do?
Joel: ... Enjoy it.



How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd

Off to HK

  • Dec. 6th, 2009 at 2:46 AM
From 6-10 Dec. Will miss the Wedeks veryyyy much! But with my family there, gonna try to enjoy myself. =)

its good to see friendship building up (:

  • Dec. 5th, 2009 at 10:00 PM
hey people! (:
back from sports captains' training camp! :D
although its kinda tiring for me, but i enjoyed the camp overall really much!
specially cause i got to know alotalotalot of my juniors, now i think i know all the names of the sec 1 scp okayy! ;D
really sad that that the seniors say leaving :(
cause they have been really great,super, wonderful people since the day i step into scp.

to the seniors:

THANK YOU FOR ALL THAT YOU HAVE DONE! I WILL MISS YOU GUYS REALLY REALLY MUCH! LOVE YOU! <3


oh ya, thank you SCL FOR BEING SUCH NICE PPL :D we didnt have any clash of space, etc during the camp :D

anw, i have alot alot alot of pictures to upload ( band concert, julia's patry & camp) so i think i will just upload them on fb!
now that i am left with about a month, i need to start on hw and start revising my work! but the worst thing is that i dont have the mood :(
i dont know wad i am gonna do man!
anw, i am going swimming on monday! super happy :D
its been ages since i last swam can!
i am waiting for my pictures to load at photo bucket -.-

[edited]
okay, i am not gonna upload pictures for scp camp here cause its taking super duper long! so i am just gonna upload one of the picture,
introducing my sister : kiimkiim :D


Photobucket

It was a rough morning. Tried my best not to let my emotions get the better of me, but I somewhat failed. Cuz my manager was like asking me why I'm not all smiley today.

Everything's still swimming around in my mind. Can't focus entirely on the given tasks. It was quite bad and thankfully for the delivery man who came and threw us 12 bags (crazy. really crazy) worth of new stocks and I have to stick the barcodes+prices on them. That really got me working like how I used to for the past few days.

Oh!
Thanks ah, Sihui. Thanks for visitng! Hahaha! I was quite busy with the Korean style thingy thing just now ah. &Stop shopping for slutty clothes even though they're always cheaper lah! Hahaha! ;)

Right. Long day tomo. Esp. since only 2 out of the 12 bags of stocks were opened today. That most prolly meant that the rest must be out by tomo.

Dai. Die. Dai.

Tillagain.

Public. Like again, I know.

  • Dec. 4th, 2009 at 1:02 AM
You don't know how bad THAT got me down. You just don't.
Don't expect me to forget, for I don't do the forget and forgive nonsense, and never will.

I thought it's just something that you already knew.

It just taught me how much sensitivity is being valued here.

Because at least I make the effort to go through the words that comes out of me, before it reaches people.

&no, I didn't tell you this, because it's like how you don't tell me much about whats going on.
Life's just fair, and I play by that rule.

Tillagain (need to report early tomo for work! :()

Retreat troops! Retreat!

  • Dec. 3rd, 2009 at 8:17 PM
I wanna go away for a bit. Like to some remote island alone. Be safe you.
There are nights where I completely shut everything off, and think about you.
&Tonight, is one of the many.
I still can't control the tears that rolled down the cheeks whenever I think about you.

I miss you. :(
And there's really nothing that anyone can do to help me.

I just want to say that I'm so glad that I had spent time with you and I'll never ever forget you because of the love that you've showered upon me, watching and caring for me in every single way, and how you always ensure that I'll be happy in everything that I do, even though I didn't had the chance to let you know. Everything came so suddenly, and I couldn't even think straight at that time.

I love you, and how I wished that it didn't happen to you.

Tillagain.
Hai to December (WLAO!!! SO FAST?!!), and to work.

Managed to get up and get to work, right on the dot. Damn cool. Haha!
There really wasn't much customers in the morning (well, 11am's still counted as morning, no?) till late afternoon, the people at my workplace showed me what I need and have to know to survive and also to help them out. Like where the stocks are and blahblahblah.

It was pretty okay and boring (dno how, managed to add up to that) until I found the kick to my work: The Cash Register.

Like seriously. It's like super fun to work that machine there, and I think I'm like waaay too happy when I'm helping people with their payments when I go: DO YOU HAVE MEMBERS CARD? WANT TO HAVE ONE?! OH OKAY. CASH OR CREDIT? OKAY. THANK YOU!
(I have yet to master the credit thingy. hahaha. Hope no one pay with credit tomo when I'm playing with it! hahaha!)

Hahaha. Like a sod. But fun lah, and who cares?!! haha!

I know I know, I'll get sick of that like soon, but will enjoy as much as I can when I still find it fun and well, being the kick to my work. hurhur.

The people there are nice, at least to this newcomer, me.
And, maybe cuz I'm like the youngest there or smth.

Right. My feetz are killing me already. Need sleep. ):
Tillagain.

Durian puffs

  • Dec. 1st, 2009 at 6:02 PM
Till this point of time, I still don't know where I wanna go and what I wanna do. Well JC is out for me so that leaves me with Poly but which course. Gosh I am so fickle and I think I don't even know myself that well. Its like choosing which colour to buy a top in. Only it'll like change the rest of my life. I can't just pick hmm navy blue over orange and everything will be fine because I could just go back and buy the orange if I really felt like it. Its like choosing a life partner. No, thats too absurd.

So Betris, what do you like? What are you good at besides eating,sleeping, facebooking all day?

The tertiary instituitions I've narrowed down to are... tp, lasalle. Well the rest are simply too far away. However its Singapore, how far away can somewhere really be? Its like primary school again, choose a school within 1km of your residence. Haha.

I want to make my own clothes. I keep saying that but nothing happens. :(

Desperate times call for desperate measures

  • Dec. 1st, 2009 at 10:36 AM
Hi, will anyone like to hire me. I think I can do almost anything. Please and thank you! :)
OR
Hi, do you have a job to introduce me too. I'll love forever! :)
Am going to work for the first time in my seventeen years of life in a few hours time.
Oh right. HELLO DECEMBER, too.
Is it just me, or is it that 2009 passes by, like seriously damn quickly?!!

I should be sleeping, really.

I am tired, my eyelids are heavy and the left one is kinda swollen (The Mother says that it's the result of me being heaty.) too.
But my body clock sets me sleeping at 4a.m. !!! Die.

I have no idea what to expect for work later.
Hope it's not going to be boring and also hoping that it won't be too tough either.
Oh wells. Come what may, innit?!

Hope things will be well for everyone since I'll be having lesser time to come online and talk a heck lot of cock like I used to.
I shall try and get some sleep, like now.

Goodnight/morning, tillagain.

"It's a zebra-crossing.."
"SO it's for zebras!!"

Lovely Bones

  • Nov. 30th, 2009 at 11:31 AM

" Adapt, don't ever change. " That's what I saw at the sink. And I use the same cubicle which has an ad for a rental flat in Kovan to escape the cold. My routine are a constant with the days and weather the variable. This routine made me forget the days of week since weekends became working days and 10-6 never felt longer since it meant like a movie, lots of iTouch action, stoning, lunch, stoning, fighting the cold, texting and hoping someone familiar will enter my Iceland.

Alice Sebold accompanied me for the first two days until reading for 4 hours makes you some sort of zombie. Thursday was slightly better, Met Daphne and Justin after a long time we discussed my future and it became vividly clear that I am clueless and fickle like that. Being in the company of " been there done that " really leaves no space for stupid mistakes and uh bad habits. Haha. I'm thankful for them.

My bank is running low, I've to fund presents, The Killers and now Muse. Sigh. Money come to me!!

Even the best fall down sometimes

  • Nov. 29th, 2009 at 11:17 PM
Oh man, lydia is like leaving tomorrow!!
freaking tomorrow! it's like so fast and i am sure i will miss her like mad
this whole week, i spent like almost everyday with her
and i never got bored before
it was really fun hanging with her, teasing her about BOBS and making fun of her whenever she do stupid retarded things
she is one friend that i treasure cause we can like talk about anything under the sun
even when we didnt meet up after a long time, there will not be any awkward moments and we can talk forever and ever
she is always so nice and sweet to me and as well to all her friends
i will definitely miss her retarded-ness
and i will definitely miss talking to her and going out with her
my one and only black friend!! HAHAH
come back soon ok!!!! and sorry for not being able to stayover tonight!
but dont worry, i am gonna send you off tmr! (:

Pictures )

Can I really ask of you..

  • Nov. 29th, 2009 at 1:39 AM
"Change; we don’t like it, we fear it, but we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind. And it hurts to grow, anybody who tells you it doesn’t is lying. But here’s the truth: the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes change is good. Sometimes, change is everything."

- Grey's Anatomy.

---
When was the last time you've seen a mix of all kinds of possible feelings, in actions, all in one night?

Like being happy and thrilled to see people coming down just to support you, regardless of the time and venue.
Being upset, scared and disappointed because of the mistakes that was made, having and letting guilt and regrets taking over them.
Being disappointed and angry with people for what they have done, and losing respect for each other.

Good for you who knows who's who that I'm talking about. No prizes though. Hahaha.

There's only so much that I can say. Then again, who am I to say what is right and wrong?!
---

I've also realised that I'm actually scared.
Scared to be alone, being neglected and of being on my own.

Shit.

---

Tillagain.

Nov. 23rd, 2009

  • 4:28 PM
My r/s with lh has been going up down up down and now it's hanging at really high and I hope it stays that way. But I guess it all depends on who explodes first and from experience he is usually the one to just tick me off first. Hahahahahha. Too much chili going between us!
We are like potassium and water. Hahahah. Yes this is how bored I am till I can think of such cheesy stuff!

Anyway, I think sisha is our happy thing. It makes everything right. Esp with beer!!!!! :) Swimming too. & I think we should just totally boycott Jurong Swimming like big time. Evil area evil place!!

He has officially start work back at boss so that means I will be seeing him lesser and lesser!! Boo because I am friendless puppy because of him :( Hahah

P1110084

P1110082

Ate at a tiny taiwaness stall along Joo Chiat one rainy night. Their egg pork floss crepe thingy was the shizz! And so was my oyster mee -sua. Love mee sua! Their milk tea sucked though :( He brought Obolo macaroons for my parents and a not-rly-that-nice-but-looked-good- and-we-thought-was-macha-cake for me!

P1110127

P1110112P1110143

I liked and hated this outing. It was one of our happiest date but also the first time I felt so much anger. Bby stayed over the day before and we decided to go swimming after watching flash forward in the morning. Waited for me to get ready before heading over to his place for him to get his stuff. Took a train to Jurong Swimming Pool where bad thing happens and when we reached JSP, it was fucking close! Freaking hell. Told him to go sengkang in the first place lorhzx. Always don't listen! Hahaha.

Flagged a cab to Clementi swimming complex as it was the nearest and swam there instead. I love clementi swimming pool! No one goes there for one thing and 2ndly, the toilets are huge! Hahah and abit creepy but whatever. Ate at the market after that and we found awesome durian pisang goreng. Wah durian banana fried tgt. Literally orgasm in your mouth can! Ate pig organ soup :) and he ate chicken rice which cheated his feeling.

HAHAHAHAH went to the busstop to take 14 down to suntec and when we reached the bus stop, two 14 just arrive and when we board, no one was on it. Fucking happy that boy that he like jumped and cheer only to realise that the next stop, the bus was going back to the interchange. HAHAHAHAHAHAH imagine our embarrassment! Haahahah took 7 to bugis then and yay I found a dollar and a lucky penny on the bus! Hahaha so I guess the wasted $0.55 trip was worth while.

Sisha at Nabins(?) after that and it was the best time ever. At one point, I got really red and high but not drunk. Felt nice but by the time I reached home it was gone sadly!

All in all I think that was our best date ever. Quite sad after 7 months leh. Haha nvm more to cme right?! Luff u fugly's daddy!